Chemo rounds 13-15 (AC)

Welcome back!  You’ve probably previously read about my first 12 rounds of chemotherapy.  In total I had sixteen rounds of chemotherapy; the first twelve were Taxol and Carboplatin (Carbo being rounds 1, 4, 7 and 10.)  The final four rounds of chemo were a set of drugs that go by the acronym AC; Adriamycin (also known as the “Red Devil”, charming right?) and Cytoxan.  

Let me start by saying it’s as horrific as it sounds.  Where I was lucky with very few side effects from the Taxol and Carbo, I was very much the opposite with my luck on AC.  The cliché side effect of chemotherapy is nausea.  That and more hit me full force.  It’s literally like having the worst flu of your life.  So… let’s chat about each round, shall we?

Between rounds twelve and thirteen I had an appointment with my oncologist and had labs done, but was able to take a week break from chemotherapy before starting the yucky stuff.  I saw Diane (another patient) while I was there getting labs, and she told me she had her last round of chemotherapy that day!  I was happy for her, and we sat in the waiting room together until she was called in by the lab tech, Malisa.  I hope she’s doing well.

Round thirteen of chemo, round one of AC fell on Valentine’s Day 2019.  Tyler took me (his idea) so we could spend the day together. (We don’t really celebrate or buy gifts, but we do exchange cards).  To start the day, Tyler and I went to breakfast together.  We tried a place in Milwaukee neither of us had ever been to, Mad Rooster, and it was friggen delicious!  I filled my belly with yummy food, and we headed to the hospital.

Because I’d had such an easy time on the Taxol everyone;  Lara, Dr. Pierce, Tyler, and myself were all hopeful my side effects with AC would be minimal.  Lara was off the day of my first AC, so Lisa, another infusion nurse, did the honors of administering the red devil and doing my infusions.  Side note: all of the infusion nurses are amazing.

I sat in the party room (I’d sat in there a few times before), which is called the party room because instead of two infusion chairs there are four.  One would go to the party room if feeling chatty.  It’s usually the room with the most activity because it seats the most patients.  

There was a really awesome lady and her daughter there, and I am kicking myself right now because I cannot remember either of their names, but I can remember the daughter’s wife’s name was Ally.  (Memory is a weird thing, and also chemo brain is real.)  It’s a really good thing Tyler brought along a Sudoku book, because I spent the entire two hours of infusion talking to these two women.  The mother, who was the patient, was there for magnesium infusions.  She had finished chemo eight weeks before but was on a limited diet and couldn’t get her magnesium levels up high enough to get her surgery.  She had ovarian cancer.  I am hoping by now she’s had her surgery.  It shouldn’t, but it still surprises me how easily I bond with the people who sit with me during infusion.  I made a cute sign for my social media photo, and Tyler took my picture, as well as a photo of the syringe with the red devil inside of it.  We later took a selfie on our way out of the hospital, too.

After infusion, Tyler wanted to get some running around done.  I wasn’t sure how I was going to respond to the new chemo, and to be on the safe side I had him drop be off at home.  It’s a good thing, because two hours after I got home the side effects hit my like a ton of brick.  The nausea hit the hardest, followed closely behind by severe body aches, chills and hot flashes, and absolutely zero control over my emotions.  I cried most of the night; partly because of how terrible I felt, and partly because I was so shocked that I felt as bad as I did.  I had a friend who’d previously finished treatment stop by the house and drop off some of her anti-nausea meds (they were different from mine) and those helped control the nausea a little bit more, but I just could not seem to get on top of it.

The boys were off the following day, and I took them with me to get my Neulasta shot.  I also talked to Diane, the NP, and was able to get a second prescription for another anti-nausea medication to help combat that.  I tried to get control of the body aches with ibuprofen.  Honestly, though, there wasn’t anything that worked 100% that first round.  When we got home from my shot, I slept while the boys played video games all afternoon (mother of the year right here.)  The boys were amazing all day.  They brought we water when I needed it, they checked on me throughout the day, and they let me sleep when I told them I needed to.  I truly have some amazingly sweet children.

Between thirteen and fourteen, Dr. Pierce ordered a breast MRI to check on my tumors and see how they responded to the first chemotherapy.  I got my results two days later - and BOY were they amazing.  Best case scenario shit.  The tumor in my breast was undetectable on the MRI. They couldn't find it. They call that a "total response" to treatment. My metastatic lymph node tumor shrunk by half.  Also amazing news.  It gave me new motivation to get through the last three rounds of AC, which as you can imagine, I absolutely hate.

Round fourteen of chemo, round two of AC Beth came along with me again.  I saw Rosie right when we walked in and told her if she had time for me I’d love some Reiki.  I was wound so tight after having such a hard time with the first round, I knew I needed to relax.  I was trying to be positive, but I was shaking inside.  Rosie came in before infusion even began, turned down the lights, and started Reiki before Lara began administering the red devil.  

The Reiki really did help, and I was able to relax.  I didn’t make any signs for this round of chemo, in fact I totally forgot to have Beth take my picture altogether.  She did, however, take a photo of Rosie doing Reiki and Lara giving me chemo because she was so touched by the moment.  Turns out it was the perfect photo for my post.  

One of the moments that stands out the most for me about this week was Rosie incorporated my son Shamus into to Reiki treatment.  Just the fact that she remembered my children, knew their names, and knew their personalities just from our conversations and meeting them once, touched me heart.

When I got home from this treatment, I was alone and trying to stay self-aware.  I tried to pay attention to my body so I could pinpoint exactly when the changes began, and could get the anti-nausea medicine in my system as soon as the first tingle of pain began.  IT WORKED!  At the first sign of muscle pain and a few stomach cramps, I took one of my anti-nausea pills and two ibuprofen.  Even though I still felt like crud, it was nothing compared to the first time.  

The next day I went for my shot, reported that I was in better control of my side effects, and went on my way. Easy!  I could barely get out of bed I was so exhausted and my body hurt so much, but at least I didn't have constant nausea.

Round fifteen of chemo, round three of AC Kaitlyn accompanied me.  We sat in my favorite room, room four.  There’s nothing special about room four except that I like sitting there.  As usual, the person who was sitting in the room and I hit it off immediately.  Her name was Gail, and she talked to Kaitlyn and I the entire time we were there for infusion.  She had previously had cancer in her uterus, and was such an advocate for self-care and self-awareness that I was inspired.  When we first arrived she was receiving Reiki from Rosie.  I raised my hand and asked Rosie to come back when she had time because I was interested in receiving treatment again.

Gail and her husband were a lot of fun to talk to, and toward the end of my infusion after I’d received Reiki, Rosie had told us how Gail had given her a box full of beaded bracelets she had made herself during her down time.  She offered bracelets to Kaitlyn and me, and had me take one for each of the kids!  The bracelets were beautiful, and there is something truly special about receiving something handmade by someone you just spent three hours talking to and getting to know.  The boys love the bracelets I chose for them, and Evelyn seemed about as interested in hers as everything else she plays with.  It lasted about 25 seconds before she moved onto something else.  I’ll save it for her.

I went back in for my Neulasta shot that Friday, and it was uneventful.  I spent most of Friday fighting off intense fatigue and body aches and watching a new show I found on Hulu about wine.  Enough said.

My last round of AC was 3/28/19, but that round deserves a blog post of its own.

Chemo Rounds 10-12

Continuing with my chemo treatment stories...
The last three rounds of Taxol and Carboplatin were interesting, and also fun. (I know that’s a strange thing to read, it’s even stranger to be writing it.)

Round ten my mom took me, and my brother Chris tagged along knowing he’d be bringing me the following week himself.  He wasn’t sure what to expect and wanted to prepare himself.  

I asked my mom to bring her brightest red lipstick with, just for fun, so we could do a photo together.  She did.  I also wore bright red shoes.  My brother joined in the photo fun.  It was my last dose of Carbo, and I can tell you I was extremely thankful for that.  My labs were good, too, which is always something you want to hear.  It was fun chit-chatting with them, and Chris engaged in some playful banter with Lara.  She liked him immediately.
I also met a lovely woman named Diane while we were there.  It was her first time having chemo, and she was nervous.  We all tried to give her support through infusion, and unfortunately she did experience an allergic reaction and some side effects of the chemo itself.  She was on a different drug than I was receiving, but the side effects were very similar to those I could’ve ended up having but didn’t.  To try to help her make it through infusion, Rosie came in and performed Reiki.  (Rosie, the Reiki lady.  That woman is an angel.)  My mom and brother were extremely respectful during Diane’s Reiki, and you could see and feel that it was helping her get through.
The weekend after round ten I was sore and tired, but again, the Carbo didn’t seem to have too harsh of an effect on me.  THANK GOODNESS!

Round eleven Chris drove me.  Are you a “Stranger Things” fan? I am!  So, of course, being round eleven I did a play on words.  I printed off a photo of the character “Eleven” and even held a waffle in my mouth during my picture for social media.  Diane sat in my infusion room with me again for her second round of chemo.  She, Chris, and I all chatted through the three hours I was there.  I learned a lot of Diane’s family, and she learned a lot about mine.  She has a great-granddaughter named Evelyn, just as my daughter’s name is Evelyn.  This round of chemo went a lot more smoothly for her, which was awesome!  
Chris and I went out of Indian food after chemo, which is one of our favorites.  He also drove me to the store… my own personal chauffeur for the day.  It felt more like we were hanging out than he was taking me for cancer treatment.  It was a good day, and because it was only a taxol week the weekend felt like any other weekend.

Can you say POLAR VORTEX?  Round twelve came when the Midwest was experiencing record breaking cold weather.  My sons, Desmond and Shamus, ended up having multiple school cancellations during this time because of the dangerously cold weather.  
Shelly took me to this round of chemo, and the boys came along!  (Evelyn goes to the sitters, even on chemo days, because she is too little to be allowed in the infusion area.)  The boys being 8 and 10 were old enough to sit there with us.  Shelly took each of them to the café and the hospital gift shop, one at a time, during the two and a half hours we were there.  I let them bring their tablets should the get bored. Honestly, having them there was actually enjoyable.  Lara put them to work (or rather they put themselves to work) passing out snacks to other patients receiving infusions, they were polite and quiet the entire time they were there, and they were inquisitive.  They asked questions, and I felt like it was really important to see what I was going through, both for myself and for them.  
Diane, the patient I’d sat with the two infusions earlier, sat with us toward the end of infusion and was able to meet the boys.  Rosie came to visit, and since I always talking about them, was extremely excited to meet them!  The NP, Diane, came in as we were packing up to leave and told me how wonderful the boys are, and how well behaved they are (little does she know…).  I was so humbled by the compliment, and showered the boys with it the rest of the day.  They really were wonderful during treatment.  They said and did all the right things, and I couldn’t ask for better sons.

Round twelve was my last Taxol treatment before starting a little bit harsher chemo, but more on that to come!

For more information on the type of chemotherapy I received for the first 12 doses, please follow this link: https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/treatment/drugs/CARBOPLATIN-TAXOL

Chemo Rounds 7-9

There is a good chance if you're reading this post, you've read the previous two about my chemo adventures!

Fun fact: before every round of chemo I have to have lab work done to ensure my blood cell counts are OK, and make sure I am healthy enough to receive chemo.  There were a few times some of my counts were border-line but I still received treatment.  Unfortunately, however, on 12/22 when I went in to receive treatment, that was not the case.  My white blood cells, red blood cells, and platelets were all in too low of range to get treatment. In addition I was running a low grade fever (bad news if you are on chemo), and had a cold.  Hurray for being immune-compromised!  I had my work holiday luncheon that day, so fortunately because I did not have treatment, I was able to make the entirety of my holiday party! In addition, Tyler had come with me, and was able to go to work and be paid for half a day!  (Which was nice since FMLA hours are unpaid, so my checks are scary!)

So, round seven was postponed because of my lab work.  I still posted a photo to social media explaining, and rather than a photo from an infusion room, it was a photo of my holding a gift I'd received in the mail along with an explanation that I wouldn't be receiving treatment that day.  Luckily, through the entirety of treatment, this was the only time I had to skip. 

Round seven came the following week.  Beth came with me again, and Gabby, my other sister-in-law was on winter break and decided to also come!  The lovely Marsha sat in our infusion room with us, and Beth had met her previously so it was actually a really great time.  Gabby asked a lot of questions about our diagnosis process, as she was getting ready to write a college entrance essay.  As per usual, I posted a photo to social media, but asked Beth and Gabby to be in the photo with me.  Marsha took the photo for us.  

Side note: the previous round of chemo which had been 2 weeks prior, Marsha was also with me.  My mom had been there that round and was able to meet both Marsha and Marsha's mom.  Have I mentioned how much I adore Marsha?  She's hilarious, fun, and it just feels good to be around her.

Round seven was a carbo week.  I was expecting to feel pretty down over the weekend, but by some miracle the weekend was not half bad!  It was the best I had felt after a carbo infusion since chemo had begun!  Happy New Year!

If I am being completely honest, I can’t remember much about round eight.  I am taking that as a good sign.  Things I do remember:  Shelly (MIL) came with me, my hat matched the infusions chair I sat in which made for an awesome social media photo (important things), I received Reiki and fell asleep during it, and my friend Laura named one of her chickens “Brave Betty” in honor of me.  It was only a taxol week, so I assume the side effects were minimal.  Honestly, the Reiki probably relaxed me so much that there wasn’t much TO remember about that day.  Sometimes that is okay.

A few days before the ninth round of chemo I registered for the Relay for Life walk/run for the American Cancer Society.  I added this to my social media post and asked for donations or for friends to join my team.  A few donated, a few joined my team.  As of today the walk hasn’t happened.  It’s in two weeks.  This was a taxol only week, and over the weekend I was tired but overall felt half-way decent.  The other Beth Gramz came to this round of chemo with me again, and honestly it was a lot of fun just hanging out with her and talking.  It seems strange to think, but Beth and I have discussed how despite this being a scary situation, we’ve grown a lot closer from it.  It’s been pretty great becoming more than just “family”!  I would say we are truly good friends now. 

There is still time to donate to my American Cancer Society Relay for Life walk on 4/6/19:  http://main.acsevents.org/goto/bravebetty

Thanks for reading… more to come! 

Chemo Rounds 4-6

When I first started down the chemotherapy road, I had no idea how I would react to it. It was unclear if my side effects would be major, minor, immediate, or delayed. For the most part, the first type of chemo I was on (Taxol/Carbo) had minimal side effects for me. There were side effects, of course, but I truly lucked out with the severity. That being said, I was more comformable getting a ride to treatment, because despite not too many side effects, my brain was always fuzzy and I was always exhausted mentally and physically by the time infusion was over and it was time to go home. 

Round three of Taxol I started to experience neuropathy in my right hand, just two fingers but that was enough to know I wanted that to stop! At the recommendation of a friend who’d previously gone through treatment, I picked up gel ice packs to wrap around my phalanges for future treatment. I began icing effective treatment round four.

Round four was a milestone treatment. I woke up the morning of 11/29/18, took a shower like any other morning, and that’s when it happened… the hair began to fall out in my hands in giant clumps! I didn’t panic, instead I ran to Walgreens, purchased from pink hair dye, and called Kaitlyn to come buzz my hair into a Mohawk. (Hey, if it’s going to go, it’s going to go down in style!) Kaitlyn came over and worked her magic! I had a bright pink mohawk.  Later that night we bleached it and re-dyed it to get a brighter color! My step-mom-in-law Beth came with me to round four, and this was a carbo week.  When I wrote this was a milestone week, I mean that in many ways. Not only did my hair begin to fall out, but I also met another triple negative breast cancer patient; Marsha. What a bright star she is.  She was nervous because it was her first round of dense dose taxol. I talked to her, tried to calm her fears, told her I had very little trouble and to be optimistic. Lara looked at me and said in just a month I went from being fearful to helping calm others’ fears. Beth was crying, Lara was crying, I was choked up. She was right. It was a big moment for me. That day Beth also gave me a journal to write in that was meant to be given to Evelyn. It was writing prompts and questions, and I began writing in it that following weekend.

The weekend after round four was rough.  The body aches, fatigue, and overall mental exhaustion after receiving both taxol and carboplatin made me unpleasant to be around, and I know it. My poor husband.

Round five I decided to try on my own. I drove myself and took some puzzle books to occupy myself.  A gentleman sat next to me in the infusion room, and I’d heard him tell Lara he needed a quiet room. She suggested he sit with me, and his response was “do you have anything quieter?” Lara responded with “oh I promise you she’s your best bet”. She was right of course. I never complained, never had complications, never needed anything. Aside from talking with whomever came with me usually I didn’t need to talk. So, the man and his wife settled in and I kept quiet and did my puzzles. To be honest I think the Mohawk made him nervous. And then... he decided to strike up conversation with me. His opening line was “You look too young to be here”, to which I responded “I feel too young to be here”.  He didn’t stop talking to me the rest of my infusion. I’m not complaining, he and his wife were sweet. They had european accents I couldn’t quite place, and told me all about their three kids, asked about mine, and told me how they found his cancer during a hernia surgery. I told them a little about myself, too. I found that driving myself wasn’t something I should do. They give me Benadryl before taxol as a precaution, and I knew I was probably too sleepy to drive home after. I made it home safely, but made the choice to try to find rides for all future appointments.

Between round 5 and 6 my hair really began to fall out. The Friday after round 5 my aunt and uncle came over and shaved their heads with me. Then Saturday my friend Johnny came over and shaved his head, followed by my brother shaving his head on Sunday. The outpouring of support was both humbling and necessary. I don’t think my positive attitude would be as possible without the love from all of these people around me.

Round six my mom came with. It was pretty laid back. We chatted through infusion and I even felt well enough (despite being tired) to eat a giant hamburger afterwards when we went out for lunch. We even joked on the drive back to my house that in inhaled the burger in record time! Not too many side effects, and by round six it was obvious that wrapping my fingers and toes in ice was working, and my neuropathy was not progressing!

So many significant things happened between rounds four and six. Looking back it feels like it all happened to someone else, but then again all I have to do is pass by a mirror to remind myself I’m the bald one. ;)

Chemo Rounds 1-3

When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, in those first few moments and days, I remember distinctly thinking to myself "Please don't let it be advanced enough for me to need chemotherapy."  I had watched my grandma go through it, I'd watched family friends go through, and I'd watched co-workers go through it.  It wasn't something I wanted.  Of course, within the first 2 days of diagnosis I knew there was no choice, especially for the type of breast cancer I have (triple negative).

The chemotherapy itself is awful, but the experiences I've had and the people I've been surrounded with for the last 5 months have made chemo one of the most amazing times of my life.  Do I ever want to do it again? Hell no!  But I would not trade these life changing moments for anything.  



My first round of chemo, 11/8/19, exactly one week after my initial diagnosis, was the scariest.  My mother-in-law Shelly took me to my appointment with my new oncologist, and we both knew it was a possibility that I'd be starting treatment that day.  Sure enough I did.  The day itself went by in a blur.  I remember meeting with Dr. Pierce, and she went over every step of my whole treatment plan in explicit detail.  Any questions I had she answered promptly, and any concerns, even the ones I hadn't said out loud, she had addressed.  She was amazing to say the least.  I felt confident in my oncologist choice from the beginning.  
The next thing I remember is being lead down the hallway toward the infusion area.  They sat me down, told me they'd start me up as soon as they could, and put me in the only private infusion room since it was my first time there.  (This was the only time I sat in the private room.)  Shelly, still with me, fired up her lap top and let me shop for head scarves.  Even writing that brings tears to me eyes.  We were all afraid, not just me.  I have cancer, but everyone in our family is battling it right along side me, and has been from day one.
In that tiny private infusion room I met my infusion nurse, Lara, for the first time.  She is spunky with short, spiky grey hair.  She reminds me of my Aunt Deb; direct, sassy, and awesome.  She set me up with an IV, we had the awkward exchange of first meeting one another under difficult circumstances, and then she let us relax.  
Diane, the NP came in after that to give me more education on the treatments I was about to receive.  She was also direct, informative, but most of all she gave off the warmest, most caring vibe.  She was easy to talk to and ask questions.  This was another selling point for me, and gave me more confidence in my oncology team.
Chemo began with carboplatin & taxol; rounds 1, 4, 7, and 10 I had carbo, all other weeks only taxol.  As Lara began my infusion, Shelly took my photo, and my social media cancer announcement went live.  I felt OK after infusion, until Saturday.  The carbo hit me like a Mac truck. I experienced fatigue first and foremost, but also body aches, head aches, chills, and an overall feeling of mental fuzziness.  Round 1 was done, it wasn't pleasant, but I survived.

The week between rounds 1 and 2, my sister-in-law Kaitlyn cut my hair in preparation for the inevitable hair loss. Even after just one round of chemo, my hair had become dry and had a rough texture.  Shelly came with, and my step mother-in-law Beth stopped in to give me wine (yay!) It was a fun night, we laughed, joked, and hung out.  I felt anxious when I arrived, but by the time I left I felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders.  I usually have a striking resemblance to my mom, but after the cut it was even more so.

Round two was stressful.  The morning before infusion I had day surgery to have my power port put in. (info on that found here:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Port_(medical) )  I arrived at the hospital around 6:30 AM, had my procedure at 9:00 AM, and went down to infusion by 11:00 AM.  It was a flurry of activity, but I met an amazing surgical nurse named Michelle who was going through literally the same treatment I was, and had the same type of breast cancer I do.  We've been friends since!  Tyler had dropped me off, and my friend Kayla accompanied me to chemo and drove me home.  While Kayla kept me company we talked about her mom who had just beaten breast cancer, we talked about her upcoming wedding, and she took a photo of me holding my power port brochure.  This infusion took less time, as it was only a taxol week.  I found that the weekend after only receiving taxol I was still mentally fuzzy, slightly fatigued, but mostly felt like myself.

By round three I felt I was finally getting used to treatment. My husband Tyler took me to my 3rd infusion.  I was able to start joking with Lara and it started to feel like I was where I belonged.  That may seem strange, but you bond with people under the most stressful of situations. The gentleman I sat with in infusion may have been the grumpiest man I’d ever met, but his wife was sweet. These were now my people, and it was starting to feel less foreign.  I made a little sign for my 3rd round to post on social media, Tyler took my picture, and so the photo diary continued.  Because I had only had taxol round three, the weekend was much the same as round two.  I had some mild side effects, but for the most part I felt OK.  I knew I was lucking out and it was too good to be true.  The week after round three my pinky and ring finger started to experience periodic tingling and numbness, then finally it evolved into sharp, stinging pains.  Round three brought on nephropathy, a common side effect of taxol.  I had been previously warned this could happen, and another friend going through treatment suggested icing my fingers and toes to help ward it off.  I went to the store that weekend and purchased gel ice packs for future infusion. I also had some chest pain the Tuesday following treatment. I ended up in the emergency room fearing a blood clot in my lung or heart attack. Luckily it was just muscle pain from chemo...

Overall, the first three rounds were a learning experience, but mostly about myself.  The outpouring of support included a lot of "be brave, be strong, you can do it!"  I appreciated, and still appreciate, any and all support, but let's be honest - I don't have a goddamn choice now do I?  

Origins: Brave Betty Hashtag?

If we are lucky, at some point in our lives someone enters our world that is a kindred spirit.  This person is someone who thinks like you, shares your opinions, finishes your thoughts, and understands you without needing explanation.  I have a few people I would consider “best friends” in this world, but as for the kindred spirit, that position is exclusively reserved for my cousin Kathleen.  She might be my cousin by relation, but she is my sister by heart.

Most of my childhood vacations,  memories, and experiences include her.  Now that we are grown women, she continues to play an irreplaceable part in my life.  We laugh at the same crude jokes, we find the same things annoying, and we value the same things in life.

Me, Grampy, & Kathleen

Kathleen was one of the first people I called when I received my diagnosis.  She knew I was headed to the doctor, but like many of our conversations we figured it would be a routine check-up.  I’d end up with a breast cyst, we'd laugh about how afraid I was to go to the appointment, and we’d move on.  It didn't pan out that way.
The first week of my diagnosis was spent in constant communication with her.  She was the shoulder I had to cry on about all my fears, not only of beating cancer, but making it through this battle while not driving my family into financial ruin. 

My husband and I both work, and me being off for treatment was going to be a burden I was not sure we would be able to handle.  She assured me everything was going to be fine. Somehow, someway, she would help me make sure it would all be alright. 

Kathleen is the driving force behind the “Go-Fund-Me” page that was created to help us get through my cancer treatments.  Prior to going live with the page, she spoke with some other family members who had previous experience with it, and was able to get a good idea on how to set it up.  It has been, and continues to be, a necessary part of our lives now.  I have been missing anywhere from 1-3 days of work each week since the fight began.  Our finances have taken a big hit, and unfortunately we aren’t wealthy enough to have a solid nest egg to fall back on.  
So, where did the #BraveBetty come from?  Well, Kathleen of course.  When the cancer fight began Kathleen wanted a hastag that would trend and be catchy.  She threw a few ideas out at me.  
My full name is Elizabeth, most people call me Beth.  She came up with a few things like #BethStrong, #BraveBeth.  Fun fact: my husband is 15 months younger than I am, and he doesn’t like to let me forget it.  Our inside joke, or rather HIS inside joke, is to call me “Grandma Betty.”  I love it, I won’t lie.  Kathleen decided to embrace our inside joke, and asked me what I thought of #BraveBetty.  I don’t know why, but it felt right.

From the moment I went public on my Facebook page on 11/8/18 with the cancer news, the same day I began chemotherapy, I became #BraveBetty.  Truth be told, without all of these people in my corner, especially Kathleen, I wouldn’t be as strong or as brave as I am.  I might be #BraveBetty, but so is everyone else who’s been behind me since this all began.
You can donate to the Go-Fund-Me page Kathleen set up by visiting either one of these two URLs:  www.FuckCancerBraveBetty.com  or  https://www.gofundme.com/6ddj4hs

Brave Betty Backstory

Most of the people who will read this blog entry already know most of what the last 4 months have looked like for me.  I have been trying to find a good way to get through this new type of chemo without losing my mind, so I thought I'd try my hand at blogging again.  I've written blog entries here and there throughout the years as a form of self-therapy, so why would breast cancer treatment be any different?
First things first, below is a timeline for the beginning of my breast cancer journey:

• I stopped nursing Evelyn the second week of May; she was just shy of 13 months old
• Approximately 2 weeks after I stopped nursing, I started to have digestive issues. I couldn't find a root cause.  I am lactose intolerant, and I tried eliminated ALL dairy from my diet. It did not improve.
• Saw my doctor in August after months of trying to self-correct my digestive issues. He ran blood tests and did a fecal culture.  Everything came back normal. He referred me to a GI specialist.
• I did a diet similar to Whole30 where I eliminated, then slowly reintroduced food groups back into my diet to see if we could figure out where my issues were coming from. The diet helped, and I started to see improvements with my digestive system, but I still didn’t feel 100% myself. The GI specialist thought maybe I had an MSG intolerance, but things just were not adding up.
• I got my Flu shot on September 7th, 2018, in my left arm.
• One week after my flu shot my arm pit began to hurt. I found what felt like a swollen lymph node under my arm.
• Two weeks after my flu shot the lymph node was still swollen, and the pain began to spread into my chest.  After following the trail of pain I found another lump, this one on the left side of my left breast.
• I ignored both of these lumps for 3 weeks before calling my OB/GYN, thinking it was a side effect of the flu shot.
• October 25th, 2018 saw my gyno for an exam.  She didn't sound overly concerned but ordered a mammogram and ultrasound since I am over 30.
• October 31st, 2018 I went in for the mammogram and breast ultrasound.  My mammogram tech and I goofed around, joked, had a good time.  She took 6 photos of my right side, and then moved to my left.  She stopped around 20 photos, which seemed like a lot to me but who knows, right?  She asked me to wait in the waiting room in case I needed to come in for more photos, also fishy, but again what do I know, right?  She did call me in for 6 additional magnified photos of my left breast, then I went in for my breast ultrasound.  During the ultrasound, the U/S tech was less talkative, but still extremely friendly.  She showed me the masses she was looking at, then asked me to wait for a moment.  The next few moments are where it became apparent that this wasn't routine.  The radiologist came into my ultrasound and no one was smiling or joking anymore.  She sat down next to the table I was laying on and told me I had multiple markers for breast cancer; the mass in my arm pit and breast were both solid masses (bad sign), there were clusters of calcium deposits around the breast mass (bad sign), and she said a few other things, but if I am being perfectly honest it's all a blur now.  Those were the two that stuck out most in my head.  Well, those... and the word CANCER.  I tried to call my husband, but I had no reception inside the imaging center.  I ended up having to text him everything that was happening, since each time I tried to call, the call dropped.  I was messaging a few coworkers I am close with, my boss, and my best friend.  Sparse details, but enough that they knew what was going on.  The radiologist told me they had an opening that afternoon and could do a biopsy that day if I could stay.  I did.  Without hesitation, I stayed, and then I went back into work afterwards. I was a mess.  I cried a lot.  But I went.  The radiologist told me she would call me the next day with news, either way.
• November 1st, 2018 I was on edge the entire work day.  The few people who knew what was going on kept asking if I'd heard anything.  Finally at 2:20 PM my cell phone began to ring with a familiar Aurora Healthcare phone number.  I know I was shaking when I answered.  It was the radiologist.  She wasted no time and got straight to the point. "The biopsy results came back, and they were unfortunately positive for cancer".  She then proceeded to tell me the type I had, not exactly, but enough that I could start my google search that night.  By some miracle, Rachel, a coworker who had recently gone through breast cancer herself, was walking through my department while I was getting the call.  My face must have said it all because she rushed over to my desk.  To say there were tears would be an understatement.  I left work shortly after getting the news. I called my husband, my cousin, my 2 best friends, and my ex-husband. I picked up my daughter on my way home, and then my husband and I spent the evening crying and trying not to panic.
• November 2nd, 2018 I met with my nurse navigator, Pam.  They waste no time.  She walked me and my husband through every painful detail that we were about to experience, and she did so with a calm I will forever be thankful for.  I had been a mess for 3 days, and for the first time Pam was able to give me some resemblance of control over my situation.  I took all of the oncologist and surgeon information she gave me and looked up the doctors like crazy.  I opted to not get a second opinion, and begin treatment asap with the doctors I had chosen.  I went with a breast surgeon name Julie Kepple.  Everything I read about her online made me feel confident.  I went with an oncologist named Brenda Pierce. Her reputation preceded her.  Everything I read about her online said she was feisty, aggressive, and the right one to have on your side.  That is exactly what I want.  I want someone as determined as me to beat this.  Pam also recommended I look into genetic testing due to my age and the type of cancer I have (triple negative.)
• We spent the weekend telling our friends and family the news.  It felt surreal, like it was happening to someone else.  I also announced to work right away.  I was having a lot of anxiety, and it was easier to lay it all out than to try to hide it and contain it within.  I tend to be an open book, and this was no different.
• November 5th, 2018 I met with Dr. Kepple to go over my surgical options.  Many of these options were dependent on other factors, the biggest being if a genetic mutation was in fact found.  A total removal of the left breast was recommended, and if a genetic mutation was found she recommended a double.  I knew I would go for the double regardless.
• November 8th, 2018 I first met with Dr. Pierce.  She was a breath of fresh air, and she was ready to start treatment right away if I was.  And just like that... my chemotherapy journey began...
  

...It should be noted, since I began cancer treatments I have tried adjusting my diet to eliminate artificial sugars, I buy organic foods when available, I buy free range chicken only, grass fed pork and beef only, and I follow Kathy Bero's  (https://www.kathymydlachbero.com/) "eat with intention to heal" cancer fighting foods list.  I haven't had any digestive issues since I made these changes.